Thursday, March 12, 2015

The Grey-ter Thinking !


Has something ever made you happy and sad at the same time? Have you ever loved the colour white that gave you black feelings? A rare few things that make you feel so extreme that sometimes you can actually feel the dismantle happening in your veins.  AH, I’m getting the raised eyebrows look, right? Probably yes. There are some things that overthinkers can do to themselves and also to others around them. You won’t even know when you’ll create a thing that was never there or abandon a person you were never with and undo those thoughts again and get back to your Nutella.  And that too ALL in your effin’ mind. It isn't rocket science for them at all. (And yes, I like using the term ‘them’ instead of ‘I’ here because it gives me a feeling that there is a collective group of weird species too apart from me in this space time. Told ya, it’s all in the Mind baby ;)).

When I clicked this picture, I never knew I could think over it so much. This is so much like Life.

Imagine yourself to be standing here below and gazing at that window. Something as minute as a four-letter word called HOPE grips you and you can feel yourself swimming in a pool of endorphins. You’ll be like there is light at the end of the tunnel, all that is dark now will soon go away and all that shit. And trust me, it’s okay to imagine such things even if your current reality is contradicting way too much because if thinking this makes you happy then don’t give a damn. Such is the power of overthinkers!  Remember if the pen is Mightier than the sword, then the mind is the Mightiest among them. :D

Now, let’s focus on the black part too.  It can cripple you with thoughts like the opening is way beyond your reach and you’re down the dumps. This is where all your past actions, mistakes and stuffs play with your mind. I can’t even tell you how insane it is when you’re in that mode. You get confused whether you wanna drown beneath the waves or die from thirst. But then again, it’s all in the so-called MIND.

So now the solution is to make your mind decipher the grey portion even.  You gotta know that is okay to not know much of it everytime and there is no other way than the one you’re already walking on. Try and learn to be clear but also welcome your vague thoughts because eventually you’re gonna grow out of the latter only. Turn around and see that you’ve got plenty of free rainbows, sunshine, glitters, night stars and even the silly power to imagine your unicorns in your mind by colouring it with those fancy crayons. Learn to not need those crayons and create your own zing in your immediate reality. After all, who the stud? YOU.J

Friday, August 30, 2013

Maybe, Definitely :)


One of those thoughts that arise when all of a sudden your general shower becomes a waterfall and you're flooded with just thoughts. Too many thoughts. I somehow feel that when we have nothing to think about and we end up thinking about only happy things then it truly means that we're happy from within. And then you just realize that Love is not just an EMOTION. It is a HABIT. Indeed a good habit :)
For example, people have different ways of expressing love. Some can word their feelings exactly as they feel and some can't. I belong to the former category and I feel really good about it. My childhood best friend Radhika says that she isn't good with words much as I am. But then again she's made me feel so loved through so many different ways that I wonder if she's an even greater Ninja than me because unlike me she doesn't even need words to express her love towards me. Right now even after she reads this I don't want her to come and tell me how she felt when she read what I've written for her because I just want her to feel happy internally. That is love maybe. She is a lot more sensible than me and she teaches me to somehow understand things without being said because she knows that I'll understand :) Although people whom I'm closest to, none of them are good with words. Like my sister doesn't do funny dance with me and my brother but at the same time she laughs and says - "This has to be on video". Maybe that is love because though she doesn't do things we ask her to but still she participates and appreciates what we do. And she made me the best birthday video too, which is definitely too much love. Its been 7 months now since my dadi passed away but my dadu when alone still switches on all the serials that she used to watch. I think it kinds of gives him a feeling that she is still somewhere beside him. Maybe that is love :).
 I like to talk and listen to different kinds of people. When people come up by themselves and tell me everything that happens with them then it makes me happy because I feel they like me being involved in their lives and when they can't then I tell them about my life because I want them to also feel that I too like them being involved in my life. This involvement is not interfering because there is something very calming about it. Just like when my maid is very tired and doing the dishes, I like to sit there on the kitchen pavement and talk to her. About her kids,her life, my life or anything. And it is amazing to see how she gets all charged up and her face glows when she's asked about her kids. Maybe that is her love towards her kids.  But here I'd like to be honest that this act doesn't make me kind because when I talk to her I don't do it because this makes her happy , I do it because I like listening to her but then if it makes her happy then I think its a good thing. You get it, there is like the "I" thing involved here. 
    My Mom and Dad love me all the time and trust me I find it very weird ! Because my mumma makes me feel like I've aced some sort of Olympiad when I fully solve a cryptic crossword. And when my dad himself gets me hot gulab jamuns rather than sending some staff even when it is raining crazy at night then I feel happy. I'm happy not because he got me gulab jamuns but because by doing this he assured me that even when times are difficult  he's gonna still do things for me. And yes maybe that is love. :)
Similarly if your friend gets you a POLO early in the morning or lands up outside your college surprisingly then maybe that counts as love too. And when a new friend of yours (who likes to have a really heavy breakfast at 5 am, haha :P) tells you that she likes your blog even without you ever mentioning about it to her then it also makes you happy lovingly :) Or maybe when your Library Teacher who hates you so much that she even suspended your issue card passes a smile to you even then you feel awkwardly happy. And then again when your retarded blogger friend who also happens to be a great dancer shares all her boyfriend issues and skips those college classes too that you don't attend somehow makes you feel loved too. Or when Tanmay, Swamy, Zubin and Chris agree to watch a girly movie like 'An Affair to Remember' with Anaaya, Alya, Zheaa and me and even break down literally crying more than us on watching the last scene then even that shows how much of love exists in our daily lives. :)
Because honestly I don't know if love is really that complex or not but it really gets simple when you love the love that you want. 
For when my friend Nikita asked me once - " Have you fallen in love, Aayushi? "
I cheekily replied - " Wrong question. Ask me when did I ever fall out of Love?" :)

Friday, May 31, 2013

Thank You :D




" Solvent. Internally. Mentally. Socially. "
I'm posting it as a Thank-You-e-note for all of you for not just making my birthday but my entire life effing awesome :)
I crib sometimes.
I crib more than just sometimes.
I crib a lot sometimes.
Okay fine I'm an f-ing cribbing soul. I admit.
And I always think that if people can still always love me sooo much is probably because they have some kind of ninja-ic invisible anti-cribbing halo - Yes you guys are that awesome \m/
Thank you soo much Mumma, Daddy, Dii, Tanu, Bhaiyas-Bhabhis, Chachus-Chachis, Mami-Mami, Dadu-Dadi, Nanu-Nani, Cousins and EVERYONE in the birthday video :D
[Alphabetical Awesomeness of you guys as I promised I'll blog about you all for sure :P]

Aditi-iiiiiiii :       Most compatible with. Check.
                         Heart to heart talks. Literally. Check.
                         Going kowloon together. Check.
                         The one person I can depend upon always. Check.
                         We love each other. And we love food. Nothing else needed.Check.
                          Love eternal. Check <3
                                           
Goenka-aaa:   Sarcasm equivalence. Check.
                         Slimmer than thin crust pizza. Check.
                         Descended a spooky valley of a forest hand-in-hand at midnight. Check.
                         Who still calls a Camera - Kamera-aaaa. Check.
                         Surprised me by pretend texting. Check.
                         Getting drunk together. Check.
                         Love eternal. Check<3

Jhawar-rrr:    Hahaha Jhawar what do I even tell about you ? :P
                       Travelled in the most absurdest way together. Check.
                       Laughed at everything and everyone together. Check.
                       Lost doing kayaking somewhere near the haunted lake. Check.
                       Loves my mom's pizzas more than me. Check.
                       Made the best mousse on my birthday. Check.
                       Love eternal. Check.<3

Nikita-aaa:    Only person who called me 'HOT' in my family birthday video. Check. :P
                       Weirdest night texts. Check.
                       Taurean counterpart. Check.
                       Monthly birthday celebrator. Check.
                       Messes up things sometimes but knows how to make it right. Check. :)
                       Polo and Nikita-aa together = day makers. Check.
                       Love eternal. Check  <3

Nishi-iii :    My Hippo. My Diddy. Check.
                   Wants me to socialise and be more people friendly but always fails. Check.
                   Asks me for reasons without any reasons. Check.
                   Effin awesome sketcher. Check.
                   Silent room. Sucks frooti. Head turns. Everyone's watching weirdly. Check.
                   Love eternal. Check <3

Paridhi-iii (F):       Finally someone who cribs more than me. Check. :P
                             Doing evil things together. Check.
                             Quirkiest response in all the review cards of all the eateries. Check.
                             Died laughing together and at each other. Check.
                             Mr. Pinto's epicism. Check.
                             Met in some hot-shot hannah montana event years back. Check.
                             Love eternal. Check. <3

Paridhi-iii (G):        Eaten up P.F's mind together. Check.
                               Crushed ice with a well kept secret. Check.
                               Did a hearty poppat of someone we know. Check.
                               Has the perfect feel-good-smiles every morning. Check.
                               Perfect shoulder sleep. Check.
                               Love eternal. Check. <3

Vagisha-aaa:      Mutually adhering to in-sane to no ex-tent. Check.
                            Pranked people togehter. Who the dudes ? We. Check.
                            3am friend who fantasizes about wearing maroon & green pants. Check.
                            Looks like a flood victim in her driving license. Check.
                            My tavelling soulmate. Check.
                            Only one who defines hogging with me. Check.
                             Love eternal. Check <3

Vandana-aaa :      Literal sister material. Next life wish, please God ? Check.
                              Makes the talktime balance blow-off. Check.
                              Own world of ours where we rock our own socks. Check
                               When together everything becomes X2 Lmao-able. Check
                               Dutch. We just have to. Haha. Check.
                               Love eternal. Check <3

Because there is family and there are friends, and then there are friends who become family :)
                                 

                            


                            
        
                   
            

Saturday, March 23, 2013

Free Hugs, anyone ?


Free Hugs, anyone? Ask me that and I would’ve said YES without second thoughts! I know every morning I’ve been rushing like so crazy for college that forget hugs I don’t even remember the last time I’ve had my breakfast at home instead of car. FML, I know! How a three letter word can make us feel so perfect physically, biologically, chemically and most importantly fantastically :D And hence this post for all the uplifting vibrations created by hugs in making our lives more Epic \m/


* Minute-to-win-it Hugs: I love the intense sort-it-all-out hugs that last for almost a minute! After that you hardly have any grudges
   against that person because they know exactly how to win your 
   heart :)  

* Double-your-size Hugs: Haha sometimes how we love being squeezed
   like a jelly jam paste from double-our-size friends :P

* David and Goliath Hugs: Only friends with major height difference
    can understand that. Major means MAJOR! They bend and you tip-
    toe. Epic :B
* Hugs that you receive from your filthy sweaty lil brother looking
    like a Hershey mud bar after his soccer match. You know he’s gonna
    mess up your hair,clothes and everything but still you go aww :)

 * Mom-Dad-You-trio Hugs makes you feel exactly like a puppy
   woofing inside.

* Mommy-I-need-you Hugs: Sick and feverish. With those stinky
   medicines and boiled veggy soup I just need my mom made hug to
   make me feel better.
 * Heavy Petting Hugs: They give you such super mamma feeling, I tell
    you :)

* Lost and Found Hugs: I remember bumping into one of my childhood
   friends nearly after 8 years.And who still remembers to make fun of
    your weird nose. Not fair :/ 

* Birthday Hugs: They vary from classy ones with air kisses to its-
   your-birthday-dude hugs :D


* Not-so-known-Hugs : Eh, random relatives hugging you. Freaks me
   out.

* Cupid Hugs : Now what do I exaggerate on this? Cupid already made

   you fall in love ;)


*  Show-off-Hugs : They are given to other friends of yours in order
    make your friend jealous with whom you’ve momentarily fought
    with for no reason. Don’t look at me like this. People actually do
    this, come on ? *facepalms*


* Dramatic Hugs : Oh everyone needs drama in their life ;D

* Best friend Hugs: They’re classic and reserved. In short, never
   replaceable always treasureable <3


* ‘Grand’parents Hugs: They’re the most comforting, experienced and
    given at times when you perfectly need one :) Indeed in true sense
    they're grand.

* Goodbye Hugs : Wet shoulders. I’ll miss you eyes. Stay some more,
   please ? :(

 

We don't need a Hugs Day to hug someone. Hug them and make them feel loved. So go ahead and Hug the world :) 
  

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Love Double A-ed Aayushi :)

I seem to have forgotten how to be with people.
^Importantly I need to realize that I can’t wish away the people coexisting with me at home and at work. At some point, I have to learn to relate to them and get along with them. I know it is even more difficult to fit in a group of new faces than it is to fit in a pair of Jealous 21’s skinny jeans! Getting along is not a one-sided process because by doing so we’re giving something of ourselves by assuring others that we ARE concerned and willing to do things for them. And hence it is how we’re affecting somebody else’s life with our thoughts and actions. For once we need to treat people just as we would like ourselves to be treated! Personally I feel the starting step to this whole fit-me-in process would be to atleast remember NAMES of people around us and replace it with- ‘Aye you’ or ‘Hey there’! Infact I’m almost trying to get rid of my habit of distancing myself from people who despite being corrected innumerable times spell my name with a single ‘A’ instead of ‘AA’! I mean I don’t even ask you to put an extra effort to spell it from your epiglottis: P. So to all my doctors, teachers, known faces, certificate writers, pizzerias. Just dial, Flipkart etc – It is MY name and I want it to be heard just the way it is. All I want is just an A with another A placed beside it! Seriously what do I do ? Place flashing bulbs around my name ? On the contrary, I make sure to pass on a joyous smile to all those first encounter folks who spell my name correctly at the first go.
:)
Thankyouverymuch. Love Double A-ed ‘Aa’yushi.  

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Refuse To Sink !


Acceptance is the most macho-est thing in this spherical habitat of mine.
Acceptance with a smile is the most macho-est thing in this spherical habitat of mine.
I’m sorry for not blogging for almost a month though I wanted to maintain at least a weekly blog! The past month has been pretty amusing and sort of saddening because something didn’t work out the way I wanted. But then I came across this and so I’m a ninja again; D
Here is how Arthur Ashe (Wimbledon Tennis Player) erupted the lost ninja-ism in me again:
Arthur Ashe was dying of cancer. From world over, he received letters from his friends and admirers. One of the letters conveyed: “Why does God have to select you for such a fatal disease?” To this query Arthur replied : “ The world over – 5 billion children start playing tennis, 5 million learn to play tennis, 0.5 million learn professional tennis, 50,000 come to the circuit, 5000 reach the Grand Slam, 50 reach Wimbledon, 4 to semifinal, 2 to the finals. When I was holding the Cup as a winner I never asked God “Why me?”
And today in pain I should not be asking God “Why me?”

After reading this all I wanted to keep on saying myself was: Trials keep us strong, Sorrow keeps us human, Failure keeps us humble, Success keeps us glowing, but only God keeps us going!
Our journey has molded us for the greater good. It was exactly what it needed to be. Don’t think we’ve lost time. It took each and every situation we have encountered to bring us to the now. And Now is right on time. :)


Wednesday, May 02, 2012

Hello.Now shut up !





Two doses daily. It’s been going on from the past 3 days. Seems my vocal chords have somehow developed a new fascination for mime. And it was even worse when my brother said that my current state of voice reminded him of Nickelback. Amidst his statement, I didn’t want my voice to be further compared with other male musicians and so I decided to keep shut. Plain S-H-U-T! Not talking to anybody made me feel I lost 5 pounds and not talking to anyone for two days in a row sort of gave me an alarming impression that I was about to vanish. At the same time nobody seemed as frustrating as for the first time everybody stayed out of my business! For the first time I just listened to what others had to say. A monologue was pretty much different from the usual dialogue, for they knew that nobody from the other side would question them or try to change the topic. Or maybe because in that moment there was no concept of asking them to just shut up. And trust me I’ve literally become accustomed to splitting headaches for I’ve heard everything ranging from how my chachi couldn’t find a chic purple footwear all over Calcutta or how a neighbour’s cat ate my maid's fish! That one moment where instead of your own routinely drama, you get to be the audience of dramas in your immediate vicinity of radius five. How you realize that everybody has a dramatic life but what really distinguishes them are the characters portrayed by each one in our respective lives? I would have written more but now my seven year old niece will read me out her Aesopica because she promised me that she won’t let me get bored till I get my voice back. :)

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

My Me-ness !

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” Dr. Seuss
 
There is always a distinction between being lonely and being alone. Akon taught me what is being lonely but I discovered the essence of being alone myself! I took the above photograph in May’ 2011 exactly at 5:28 am when I went to Edinburgh. When you live in the world 100 metres below you, you always crave to see the world 100 metres above you. And that is the very same thing that caught my attention in the midst of everything! Neural actions doubling their speed in my body, the decision was taken. This was it. I wanted to live alone up there. I wanted to grow my own vegetables and herd my own cattle. Pretty medieval, I know, but pretty peaceful too. I wanted to know what is so “Me” in me that was still undiscovered! That path of introspection was necessary for me to love myself the way I am. Aah how I wish someday I could live up there not forever but just for once. Just me and my Me-ness.:)

Monday, April 23, 2012

The Epic DeePee :D

Busy with uploading our Facebook profile pictures, have we ever wondered what picture God will be uploading as his DP if he happens to be in each one of our friend lists?! If you’re the Rockstar stud, then your God must be the punked up Rockstar too, with plectrums and a crashed guitar, tattoos inked all over plus not to forget the gravity defying hairstyle! If you’re the Barbie kinds, then your God must be having Pink Pyjama parties depicting panache at every eye blink and prim MAC make-up! If you’re the shopaholic types and have all the cash in this world to splurge on, then your God better be a Coco Chanel product- swooning over Jimmy Choos and Marc Jacobs!  And if you’re the like-all Apple products guy, then dude Steve Jobs is your God! For a Gadget freak, God being the proud owner of all the PSPs, must be making all the hell and heaven dwellers openly J. (J as in jealous)! If you’re the Geek or the Nerd, then trust me your God would be the only one believing that 100 percent attendance and your entire wtf thesis are some cool stuff –haha. No pun intended. Or perhaps intended. And if you’re very much in love then your God =Cupid. But if you’re a Nobody like me then your God must be the one with ancient jeans and dad-sized SpongeBob imprinted t-shirts, who would not be above you but sitting there - right beside you. The one who will like even your crummiest photos or updates on Facebook assuring you that atleast somebody likes a stupid like you! The one who won’t crave to be a Blackberry Boy just because you don’t own one. In short, he must be the best friend types who even at scorching 45 degree Celsius would prefer sharing hot chocolate instead of chilled soda with you just because you have a throat infection:)

Seventeen Again


Recently on one of my usual browsing sessions, I came across one of the surveys conducted by some psychologists who state that to make up for one negative action of yours; you need to undo it with seventeen positive actions! Shockingly the ratio is actually 17:1. Tuning it with my daily life I realized that it actually is true! For I accurately tend to remember one slap or thrashing given to me by my parents or siblings than I remember the 17 good things they ever did for me. Obviously the count is much more than 17 but I never bothered to notice them in front of that one hit. If that is the case, then even scientific calculators won’t be able to estimate the X 17 things I have to make up for! Kill me now. OhGod. Need to get working immediately. Okay bye. So remember to be good X 17 times you’re being bad :)